Bony’s Top Ten Texts of the Week

10. Who’s ready for a kick ass Monday?!?! – Louisiana

9. You should invent blades that play the power rangers theme song when cruising around. – Pennsylvania

8. Would you rather suck a dick or bang a 15 year old girl? – New York

7. How did you lose a gun? – South Carolina

6. Vamshi fucking loves you. – Georgia

5. If I can’t get my fasted walking in, do you think a fasted tickle fight would be about the same? – Louisiana

4. You interested in a wood carving of a couple of dudes involved in a double Dutch rudder? – Louisiana

3. Also, you are definitely not gay right? – Maryland

2. You think you could knock a horse out with one punch? – Louisiana

1. What’s the difference between you and a rooster? Rooster cries” cock a doodle do” where as you scream,”any cock will do!” – Australia


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